I find it amazing what happens to each of us in our daily life: we want something/somebody so badly, we find it (either by inertia or with some help from the others), we are really happy, we consume our happiness and, out of a sudden, we integrate it as we don’t even know that it is still with us. It disappears or, even worse, it gets in our way. The exuberance of our passion is not time resistant, it simply flows into normal.
This model is applicable in our families, at school, in sport, in love and in the job. We adapt, meaning we cannot keep happiness forever and even our grief cannot be as strong as it used to be at the beginning.
Let’s imagine that you have a complicated report to be done. You don’t like it at all. You feel like going to smoke more often than usual and each time when you get back to your excel sheet (because, we like it or not, we need to Excel in our work) it seems even more complicated and it is harder and harder to get it finished. Why all this?
Often we choose to break our hard experiences as they seem unbearable for a longer period. At the same time we do want our pleasant experiences to be permanent without knowing that, no matter how nice it can be, we will lose contact with our happiness. Thinking about our joyful moments we cannot feel a greater happiness, at the same time if we remember our pain we still can feel it.
It would be great to finish our task without too many smoking breaks (think how difficult it is to start again).
We should take a break within the things that we love, just to feel again the joy of doing it.
Let surprise get into our lives, so that our satisfaction level can get higher. It is a scientifically proven fact, as D. Ariely mentions in “The Upside of Irrationality”. Why? Because predictability kills pleasure, while surprise can load it with attention, joy and progress.
This is why it is better to work in projects and teams that can challenge you. Try new things that can take you to the next step of your development. Don’t accept routine, it is the road to disappointment and failure.
Keep also in mind that our fulfillment has a reference in our perspective over the other people status and our happiness depends on our ability to keep at least equal to them.
Recommendation for managers and HR professionals:
Support your people to get rid of routine, imagine „surprises” that can change boring job scenarios.
Design together with your good potential people suitable formula for their careers and make sure that they are permanently exposed to challenges that keep them open to learn.
Be careful to internal and external equity! Make effort to build healthy references for people so that they may feel fulfilled!
And one more: Always apply these first to you!